The Downside of a Calling

As I write this, I am in tears. Every bone in my body is literally aching to return to Bologna tomorrow. There is so much that stands in my way, and I am grieving it. I don't long to return to be comfortable (it's not), I don't long to return to escape the process of raising the support we need to return (I LOVE sharing what God is doing in Italy). I am longing because for some crazy reason, God has written Italy on my heart and I cannot be free of it.

It is a gift to be so sure of our calling. When we are enduring the Questura or literally melting from the heat, we can press on knowing God has some very specific plans. And the steps of faith we have to take every day feel a little less scary knowing that He will finish what He has begun.

But the downside is the incredible ache we feel to be doing what it is God has called us to do. I long for the people and the conversations and opportunity to talk about Jesus with so many who want to and know nobody to do so with. I long for, yearn after, want with every fiber of my being to be in the place where God has called us. It is permanently a piece of me.

We have shared how thankful we are for this furlough God has provided for us to get some rest before returning. We really are. And He is providing that rest. As we soak it up, and our energy returns, we find ourselves now struggling with what is between us and the place God has made for us in Bologna.

Time. We have to be out of the country until January because of tax reasons. Nothing can change that. We are trying to make the most of these days to prepare us to be fully-charged to return. Waiting is hard. Really, really hard.

Money. We still need to raise almost $2000 a month to cover our increased cost of living needs. In the past, I would have been really anxious about how God was going to provide this money. I think I am able to better walk in faith these days. I know God would not have written these people so deeply on my heart if He didn't still have plans for us there. Still, we need Him to provide. And quite frankly, I am so in awe of what God is doing in Bologna that I want to tell everybody about it! I want everyone to partner with us and have a chance to be a part of an incredible, humbling, amazing work by the Spirit of God! I want everyone I meet to catch a glimpse of what God is doing and be a part of it.

The ache hurts. But it is beautiful. It is evidence of God, and I rejoice! I am driven to pray and ask and claim like I never have been before. Would you please pray with us? Would you please join in praying for God's provision of the support we need? Would you pray for our little corner of the world and the place God has made for us there. . . that He would continue to be at work and that we would have the privilege of seeing a harvest in Italy that has not been seen in generations. Pray for the sweet friends we have made. Pray they would one day live in the freedom Christ died for. Pray they would one day know eternal life.

Thanks friends. Thanks for aching a little bit with me.

A Stranger at Home

I know, I know. . . you are thinking that since we are back in the States for a bit, we should have plenty of time to keep up the blog. Life has been crazy since our airplane touched down two and half months ago. We keep thinking, "after _______ it will slow down." But the reality is that raising support is crazy. We have been traveling non-stop. We are thankful to be so busy, even if we have to apologize for our absence from the blogging world. It is my goal to again be a faithful Monday morning blogger--OK, I'm going to say a Tuesday morning blogger. That's when Ben goes to Mom's Day Out!

I don't have a great picture for what I really want to blog about today, so I'm throwing in a random one. Last week Cody and I celebrated our Tenth Wedding Anniversary. On our honeymoon, we spent a week in New England. So for almost a year we have been saving to take an extended trip to Boston. We spent four days there last week, and it was awesome. The weather was perfect, and the whole trip went a long way toward the rest we've been pursuing.

Now, to what I wanted to share. . . in the months leading up to our trip back to the States, we talked about how much we were looking forward to "going home" for a bit. We couldn't wait to enjoy some of the comforts of America. Looking back, I think we were looking forward to the feeling of home more than anything else. A place where we belonged.

The painful reality is that America doesn't feel like home anymore. Yes, it's nice to be able to speak the same language, enjoy the same foods and understand how the culture operates, but we don't have a life here anymore. And who else around me understands the weird Twilight Zone I'm living in--trying to savor such everyday blessings as helping the kids with homework we actually understand and worshipping in English while also trying to prepare for returning to Italy by taking language classes, working tirelessly to maintain relationships long-distance and stocking up on taco seasoning packets to take back with us. I am now saying, "I can't wait to go home," and I mean Italy. That's where our life is. To be saying that marks a great milestone in our transition overseas.

But the other reality is that Italy isn't really home either. My life is there, but I'm not fully comfortable there. There is still so much that is foreign to me.

This week I was doing a Beth Moore Bible Study on the Psalms of Ascent, and in Psalm 120, the author says, "Woe to me that I dwell in Meshech, that I live among the tents of Kedar! Too long have I lived among those who hate peace." She makes the observation that the author is neither from Meshech or Kedar and he is exhausted living as a foreigner. And then she asked the very timely question, "Have you ever felt like a foreigner?" Oh wow. Do I ever. And even in my own country.

Never in my life have I understood my citizenship in heaven as concretely as I do now. This place I'm at is weird. I find it hard trying to put it into words. But I am also thankful for it. I would never know the goodness of being a stranger at home--the longing for the sense of "home" that will only come in heaven--if we hadn't stepped out in faith to leave what we felt was that place all along.

The lessons never stop. The blessings never stop. God is good, all of the time.

Back in the States

The blog returns....after a month long hiatus. We've been back in the States for about a month now and have spent about three weeks of that time on the road visiting friends and family in Texas and New Mexico. When not traveling, we usually find ourselves in some doctor's office getting something looked at.

One of the trips we took was out to Albuquerque to visit friends and share about our time in Bologna. Whenever we spend time in Albuquerque, we always stay with some friends who we've known since before we got married. We've always valued their wisdom and faith as we've walked through marriage and what God has called us to. Our kids see them as another set of grandparents and are getting old enough to begin learning from them as well.

With that in mind, I really wanted Gavin, Jim, and I to get some time out in the wilderness of New Mexico so we could be boys. Jim and I talked about it a bit and decided to take a day hike at the peak of the the Sandia Mountains. Jim knew a great trail that would be just long enough and interesting enough for Gav. It began at the top of the mountain and led down through the forest for a bit before coming to an old stone house that marks the halfway point. We spent some time climbing around the old house before making the return journey.

Gavin thought it best to go armed with two water-pistols and spent much of the hike looking for small woodland creatures toshoot, but only managed to scare off two birds. It was a great trip for him and we all enjoyed being out of the city for a bit. The hike concluded with a hearty lunch at The Frontier, a popular dive right across the street from where I went to college.

Our Final Weekend

This past weekend was our last weekend in Bologna till the Fall and we felt like sitting in the house was not a great way to spend it. The Italian team had already been bounced from the World Cup and the U.S. was not playing till Saturday night. So....we decided to take a short roadtrip! We have some friends who had visited two towns just northwest of Bologna a few weeks before and thought our kids would like it. So, we piled in the car Saturday morning and headed out.

Fidenza is a smal town about an hour and a half from Bologna along the old Roman road called Via Emilia. This road runs the entire length of the region of Emilia-Romagna. Yet for all the historical-ness of this region, Fidenza is known for the brand new Outlet Mall that just opened. While shopping is not my cup of tea (Cody here), they had a really nice playground for the kids to play on. After running around for a hour or so and then a quick lunch, we headed to our primary destination of Castell'Arquato. It's believed that this small town began as a Roman military settlement and developed into a rural farming center during the Imperial Era of the Roman Empire. As you can see from the pictures, the castle itself was built into the hillside to take advantage of the surrounding area.

The picture above was taken about 10km outside the town as we drove in. It was a beautiful drive through pastures and vineyards and one of the few times we've not been on the Autostrada as we've travelled. The kids had a great time climbing all over the castle grounds and surrounding hills.

At one point, Gavin stumbled onto a smal cave that had been cut out from the hillside directly below the castle. Needless to say, he was in Heaven exploring the town.

It was a great way to spend our last weekend as a family before the mad rush of our final week. We're currenty in the throes of packing, cleaning, organizing, and prepping for our time in the States. As you think of us this week (especially on Thursday as we fly), please pray for us! The blog will take a short break, but we hope to be back with you in a couple of weeks! Ci vediamo dopo!

MONDIALE 2010!!!!!

Here we are four years removed from our first trip to Italy and we have the privilege of experiencing another World Cup in Italy. While little was known or expected from Gli Azzurri (the Italian squad) four years ago, this year Italians are even less expectant of a successful World Cup.

"The squad is too old, they have not played together long enough. The coach is no good." These are just a few of the exclamations we have heard from our neighbors and friends. Regardless of how Italy does this year, the level of involvement on a communal level is still so much fun to be a part of. . .and this time we have the added experience of knowing the langauge.



As the Mondiale 2010 (World Cup) approaches, one sees more and more Italian flags going up in windows and shops. And flat screen TVs appear out of nowhere at gelato stands and pizzerias. The photo above is a scene from our local gelato stand, which we frequent almost daily. This was taken moments before Italy kicked off their first game of this year's World Cup. While most people won't argue that the Super Bowl is the sporting event of the year in the U.S., one doesn't see the total community experience like that which exists here in Italy for soccer. Everything from daily conversations to work schedules on a national level are affected by when Gli Azzurri play. In otherwords, EVERYTHING stops when Italy is on the field. There is nothing that one can do aside from join in and cheer them on.
This past year, we've also seen Gavin take a keen interest in playing soccer ("calcio" in Italian). We tried to introduce it to him when we arrived two years ago, but he was not interested in the least. After a year at school, where he plays it everyday with his friends on the playground, he has become quite adept. Going outside to kick around has become a daily activity in our household, and as far as he is concerned, Italy is the best team in the tournament. Hopefully, he won't be too heartbroken if things don't work out this year....

Gelato Season is Here!

Cody and I have said that after last summer we both suffer from a little "Post Traumatic Summer Heat Disorder." Knowing that the heat is on its way is enough to send us both into a little bit of a panic.

It's definitely warming up. The past few days have been in the upper 90's, and we finally rolled out our portable air conditioner to set up in the living room during the heat of the day. The one perk (and we're really stretching to see a bright side!) is that when the heat comes, gelato is no longer a special treat but a neccessity.

This was the first time we let Ben have his very own cup. He did really well and was only slightly sticky for the bus ride home.

Italians know how to do gelato well, and they optimize it for summer cool-downs. Gelato is more dense and less creamy than ice cream, so it isn't nearly as heavy. And there are usually more fruit/sorbet flavors offerred than any other kind. The average serving size is probably less than a 1/2 C. It's just a bite of cold. That's really, really yummy.

Conveniently, there is a really good gelato stand on the way home from the kids' school. Since we have to pick the kids up at 4:30 in the afternoon, it often takes all we have to gear up for the walk. Knowing there is a little treat to look forward to somehow makes it a little more bearable.

The kids celebrate in April when the gelato stands open, and so do we. They are kind of like coffee bars--the commraderie of trying to survive the heat brings you together somehow. And it's a sad sight when they close up shop in the Fall. But for now we are enjoying the gelato season in full swing!

Another Year of Answered Prayer

Friday was Hannah's last day of school. She now has two years of Italian schooling under her belt. Next year--third grade!

There could not be a more tangible example of how the Lord has answered prayer over the past two years. We prayed and prayed and prayed for Hannah's school experience. For her, for her teachers, for friends. We could not be more grateful for all the ways He has answered abundantly. Hannah's experience is far above and beyond what we could have even dreamt to ask.

We've written before that in Italy you have the same class, and the same two main teachers for all five years of elementary school. It can be a great thing or a horrible thing. For Hannah, it's been incredible. We think her teachers are great. They have done such a good job helping her transition into Italian schooling. They have been gracious with her and they have pushed when needed. And we generally think they are really good teachers.

But an even bigger answer to prayer have been the friends God has provided. Her class is just a great group of kids. Not that they're perfect, but we have heard very little about the cliches and caddiness we've heard about from friends with kids in school in America. We don't think it has anything to do with the fact that they're Italian. . . they're just good kids. There is a group of about seven girls who are all good friends. Every Monday after school we would rotate going over to someone's house to play. What a sweet, sweet gift.

And then there are the parents we've gotten to know. We feel completely welcomed and included. They have demonstrated such patience with us in language and cultural learning. Our sense of feeling like we belong in Bologna and have a life here is largely due to Hannah's school and all the relationships we have there.

Cody and I are blown away by the incredible blessings we've found through our brave daughter walking into a classroom not speaking a word Italian and persevering for two years. She is thriving. She has been the reason we've met our closest Italian friends. She is getting a great education (things change in the Italian system in high school. . .). She knows the ways God has answered prayer on her behalf, and it's grown her own faith.

So we celebrate this day! We celebrate God's continued hand on Hannah. We say thank you for joining us in praying for her. And we say thank you to God for caring so much about such a thing as second grade.

They're Here!

On Wednesday, 22 students from Texas and Louisiana arrived to work with us for the next five weeks. Here is the group enjoying some of their first Italian pizza:

This is a great group of students! We have spent the past several days getting them oriented to Bologna and the ministry and basic survival in Italy. They have asked such great questions and have really communicated a genuine desire to speak the gospel with boldness this summer. For many, committing five weeks to doing ministry in a different country is the biggest step of faith they've ever taken. It is huge! We can't wait to see how God blesses their faith and the fruit that comes from it.

The picture above is Cody talking to Luke, the leader of the group, and also a student. He was on the Project last year and developed such a heart for what was going on that he wanted to return again this summer. Secretly (or not so secretly), we're praying God would move his heart to come and work with us for a year or more after he graduates.

On Saturday, Cody led a time of evangelism training. One of the things we're really trying to emphasize is the power of God's Word. As we're processing through the gospel with Italian students, we want to be sharing as much of what God says in Scripture as we can. If we do that, then we feel we can be confident that seeds were planted, and we can leave the results to God. A study we saw recently said that Italy is one of the least Bible-literate countries in the world. As we bring everything back to what God says in His Word, it is refreshing to hear Italians awe at all God has spoken on.

Please pray for these American students. Pray they would experience God in a powerful way this summer. Pray He would increase their compassion for the people of Italy and that many would be moved to return and work with us in a longer capacity. Pray for the Italian students they will talk with over the next five weeks. Pray for ongoing relationships to be formed quickly. Pray for relationships that are focused on the gospel. Ultimately, pray they would see Italians put their faith in Christ.