A Culinary Schizophrenic

Can I confess one of the most paralyzing things I've experienced since being back in the States?

Deciding what to cook and going to the grocery store.

It seems like it wouldn't be that hard.  Kind of like getting dressed in the morning.  You just do it.  For the first month after we returned, I was struck every day with panic over what to feed our family.  I would walk into the Super Target right across the street and meander aimlessly through the aisles.

For the first 34 years of my life, I shopped at an American grocery stores and cooked American food.  Why did that all of a sudden seem impossible?

I guess this is a classic expression of reverse culture shock.  Did you know there is culture shock in returning to your home country?  I think I had heard about it before, but I certainly hadn't given it any thought.  And then I was paralyzed.

I am not exaggerating when I say I cried every time I went to the grocery store for the first three weeks we were back.  It was absolutely overwhelming.  I had gotten used to cooking Italian food.  Now I couldn't find the ingredients to make what I was used to cooking and I couldn't remember what the heck to cook with the American food on the shelves.

A wise friend offered great words of advice.  Having lived overseas herself, she said, "Your life in Italy will always affect your current life.  Think of that as a good thing."  Yes.  Good that I don't want to make hamburgers or pot roast or Bar-B-Que.  It's OK that we are craving mozzarella balls and pasta carbonara.

So step one was accepting the new culinary schizophrenic I had become.  I don't have to cook like an American and I can't cook entirely like an Italian.

Fast forward two months and our meal plan this week has two all-American dishes and three Italian dishes (and a Chinese dish just for the heck of it).  We made Bolognese Ragu for the first time last night (it's been way too hot outside to make it before now. . . ), and it was divine.  With the coming of Fall in Italy always came Ragu.  It just felt right.  And on Christmas Eve this year, we will have have Tortellini and Brodo, just as every family is Bologna will.  Of course, Christmas Day will bring a big, ole' turkey or ham--neither of which will be eaten by an Italian.

Step two was finding somewhere to shop where I wouldn't break down in tears!  I found a great little "market" of a store called Freshfield Farms that helped me imagine a manageable shopping experience.  They have beautiful fresh produce, and they have fresh meats they cut themselves.  That's it.  On Saturdays I drive up to Winter Park to go to their Farmer's Market, which is life-giving to me.  Small vendors, fresh produce, seasonal vegetables.  And there is even a vendor where I can get some of the Italian cheeses we desperately miss.

There is still much I miss being able to get at the store, but I'm slowly filling in the gaps.  And no tears in weeks!  Once more, I am learning how to embrace the new me.

An Italian Childhood

Our kids had a great time in America last Fall.  But if you ask Hannah, she will say, "I don't want to go back to America for a long time."  Though she likes the US, Italy is her home.  A totally normal thing for a missionary kid.  But still a little weird for Mom and Dad.

Our family has experienced all the same events during our time in Italy, but our kids are being shaped in an entirely different way than we are.  Their childhood memories will be completely different than ours ever were.  Riding trains are a normal part of life.  They go to school in classrooms where the lights aren't turned on unless it's raining outside.  Just different.

Of course, a big part of an Italian childhood are birthday parties.  We have said it before, but they are just a huge part of childhood for the kids.  We went to yet another party this weekend, and it was a fully typical Italian party.

The family of the birthday girl rented a social community center and invited every kid from class, plus all the extended family.  Birthday parties are such a big deal that there are business who provide the entertainment and activities.  This family hired such a company.  Above, the kids are playing old-fashioned tug of war, facilitated by the entertainment guy.

Sack races, using trash bags

Of course, a group of boys gathered to play soccer.  Gavin played for the entire evening.

In between planned activities, there was lots of dancing.  Here is Hannah with her friends, doing a choreographed dance they often do during recess at school.

Mostly Ben sampled the food and made sure the swing got a workout.

Food is an integral part of every birthday party.  And you usually have to feed a lot of people!  At this party, they served fresh crescentini.  Crescentini are something specific to Emiglia-Romagna (the region of Italy Bologna is in).  In fact, our friends who live in other parts of Italy have never even heard of them.  Very representative of what Italian cuisine is like--vastly different dependent on region.  

Anyway, we LOVE crescentini.  They are one of our very favorite things.  Basically, they are sopapillas that you use as sandwich bread.  You spread something similar to cream cheese on it and then top it with sliced meats.  This meat is cured prosciutto.  Then you fold it in half and enjoy!  On the sweeter side, you can also spread nutella or jams on top.  Yummy, yummy, yummy.

Italian etiquette is that you don't leave until the birthday cake has been cut--usually about two hours into the party.  This cake was tiramisu.  And it was good. :)

After the cake, but before the presents were opened, the entertainment crew did a magic show.  That was a first for us.  

The weather was beautiful, and we enjoyed every minute of being outside.  Gavin was quite upset when we finally left at 7:30 to get the kids to bed.  "But Mom, we only got to stay for three hours!"  And truly, we were the first people to leave. 

This is where we seem to have the best ministry opportunities.  Three hours of partying leaves a lot of time to chat with the other parents.  It's what the kids will remember as their "normal childhood," and it's what we'll remember as the environment God used to teach us a lot about Italian family and culture.

Recipes (a bonus post!)

I'm just getting it started, but I wanted to let you know about a new blog I've started to record some of our favorite Italian recipes.  There is a link on the side bar (to the right), but you can also click here to check it out.  There are only a few recipes there now, but it will be growing soon.  Feel free to give the address out to others who might be interested!

Valentine's Day

We had the most perfect, least-planned Valentine's Day ever.  We celebrated with the kids and enjoyed a low-key evening at home.  Of course there were flowers and chocolate, which makes every Valentine's Day perfect.  The flowers were for me (Jen) and the chocolate was for Cody.

How do say love with chocolate in Italy?  A chocolate salami, of course!

It's taken me three years to give this one a try.  It just seemed so. . . unnatural.  Wow, have we been missing out.  It was incredible!  Just like fudge.

It made for a very happy husband indeed. :)

A Full Weekend

Let's be honest.  We don't have a "normal" 9-5 job.  We never have.  The weekends are when we do some of the most time-intensive ministry.  This past weekend would have completely worn us out, even a year ago.  But now, though we're a little physically tired, we had a great weekend!

We spent all day Saturday preparing for dinner with Fabio and Alessia.  We have never cooked them an Italian meal before (PRESSURE!), but long story short, she volunteered to bring Octopus salad.  Yes, octopus.  It's served cold with a little olive oil, vinegar and mint.  And in case you're wondering, yes, there are suckers involved.  My planned fried chicken was not going to go with Octopus salad.

So plan B.  I thought, and asked around, and scoured cookbooks.  Finally, I settled on Risotto with Salmon and Spumante.  I also made an appetizer of spinach and artichoke dip (not an italian dish, but I had to have something. . . ).  Long story short, dinner was great!  My one social faux pax was serving the spinach and artichoke dip as an appetizer.  It also has mozzerella and cream cheese in it, which apparently qualifies it as a secondo (the second course, which is usually meat).  Now I know. :)

And for the record, Cody, my seafood-weary husband, ate everything.  He even came close to saying he liked the Octopus salad ("As long as I didn't think about what I was eating, it wasn't bad!").

A snow-covered vineyard

On Sunday morning, we packed up everyone and headed downtown to visit a new evangelical church started by some missionaries from England.  We also woke up to a beautiful snowfall that continued all day long.  Though captivating, it made for a cold, wet walk downtown.  The kids couldn't resist every opportunity to pick some up or jump in a melted puddle.  The church was a great encouragement (it's entirely in Italian).  We are praying about what the Lord would want for our involvement in it.

Part of the drive up into the hills around Bologna

As soon as lunch was over, we hopped back in the car and drove to the hills just outside of Bologna to meet some American friends at this restaurant they have been raving about for a year.  It was a crazy, snowy drive, but the sights were incredible.  And the food was amazing.  They specialize in crescentini, these sopapilla-like things you put cheese and meat and jelly and nuetella on.  They are local to the Emilia-Romagna region and are one of our very favorite culinary discoveries.  Two and half hours later, we left with bellies unable to hold one more bite and hearts full of thankfulness for God's provision of friends we really enjoy hanging out with (this family has kids our kids age, which makes is that much easier).

Hannah savoring every drop of the lemon sorbetta they brought for the kids

The parking lot of the restaraunt--the kids were dying to play in the snow.  Unfortunately, Ben didn't have gloves, so it didn't last for long.  It was incredibly beautiful though!

The kids couldn't hold it any more.  They completely crashed on the way home from the restaurant.  A good time was had by all!

We got home at 5pm, just in time for Hannah to finish her homework and all of us to crash.  Tired, yes.  Exhausted, no.  We were even energized a bit by it.  We have come so far in the past two and half years!  We are so deeply encouraged by the life God is weaving together for us here.  Our friends come from such different places--Americans, Italians, missionaries, Agape Italia staff, non-believers--but they each meet a specific need.  It is good.

A Bonus Post

Yesterday when I was getting the kids a snack, I was reminded of one of the Italian food things that cracks me up.  I thought I'd share this little glimpse into the culture with you in a bonus post!

This is a bag of cookies (the ones pictured on the right).  I give them to the kids for a snack with a little Nutella on top (Nutella and peanut butter for  a REALLY special treat :) ).  What this is saying is that they make an ideal breakfast. Six cookies, fresh juice, berry yogurt and coffee.  380 calories.  Perfect.

Ah, Italian cuisine.  It's incredible.  Even Italians draw the line at pasta for breakfast though--the problem is they just don't have any good alternatives.  Unless you want cookies for breakfast.  :)

Gelato Season is Here!

Cody and I have said that after last summer we both suffer from a little "Post Traumatic Summer Heat Disorder." Knowing that the heat is on its way is enough to send us both into a little bit of a panic.

It's definitely warming up. The past few days have been in the upper 90's, and we finally rolled out our portable air conditioner to set up in the living room during the heat of the day. The one perk (and we're really stretching to see a bright side!) is that when the heat comes, gelato is no longer a special treat but a neccessity.

This was the first time we let Ben have his very own cup. He did really well and was only slightly sticky for the bus ride home.

Italians know how to do gelato well, and they optimize it for summer cool-downs. Gelato is more dense and less creamy than ice cream, so it isn't nearly as heavy. And there are usually more fruit/sorbet flavors offerred than any other kind. The average serving size is probably less than a 1/2 C. It's just a bite of cold. That's really, really yummy.

Conveniently, there is a really good gelato stand on the way home from the kids' school. Since we have to pick the kids up at 4:30 in the afternoon, it often takes all we have to gear up for the walk. Knowing there is a little treat to look forward to somehow makes it a little more bearable.

The kids celebrate in April when the gelato stands open, and so do we. They are kind of like coffee bars--the commraderie of trying to survive the heat brings you together somehow. And it's a sad sight when they close up shop in the Fall. But for now we are enjoying the gelato season in full swing!

One Unexpected Venue for Learning

As I continue (Cody here) to grow in my mastery over the Italian language (which really still has mastery over me), I find more and more doors opening up to allow me into the culture. While this is not a new or deep thought, it has lead me down a road I never imagined myself going.

Over the course of our first year here, I tried to educate myself somewhat on the basic principles of wine...more specifically Italian wine. I soon found out how daunting of a task this could be. In a country that produces around 1 billion litres per year and has over 1 million vines under cultivation, I found myself simply not wanting to sound completely ignorant walking into a winestore. As I've tried to learn how to master the lingo, I have also, unexpectedly, learned incredible things about Italy and the people and history.

A year later, and with far more Italian under my belt, I find myself wondering why I can't find a Sangiovese Superiore that I really like (I finally did last weekend!) and trying to figure out how to ship home the 1.50Euro bottle of local table wine that is impressively good. Of course, as with most learning experiences, if it can be shared with a friend, it's usually more enjoyable. So last April a friend and I decided to educate ourselves in the realm of Italian wine. What began as a get together once a month has now developed into a weekly dinner to discuss what we're learning, try a new wine or enjoy a favorite.

Last weekend, we spent the entire day visiting local vineyards to talk with producers and become more familair with the entire process (sorry I don't have pictures! It was incredible). It may seem kind of weird, but experiences like that are exactly the kind of language experiences I need. I have enough to follow what's being talked about, and it's in an environment where I'm stretched to grow in my ability to communicate. My friend and I are now talking about what it would take for us to enroll in a Sommelier course this Fall (a Sommelier is an official "wine expert"). Who knows. . . anything is possible.

With wine being so much more than just a beverage here in Italy, it has been a really fun way for me learn more about Italian heritage and culture, while growing in my language skills too. Again, who would have thought God would have used wine in this way?

A Bonus Entry

I saw something this week I just had to blog about. . . if only I had had a picture!

Obviously pizza is big here. :) Usually, you order one pizza per person. They are about a foot in diameter, but the crust is really thin and toppings aren't very dense. They're always cooked in a wood-burning oven. Common pizza toppings include: sausage, prosciutto (ham), bell peppers, mushrooms, artichokes, and salami. You can also get toppings such as potatoes, sardines, egg, tuna, and hotdog.

Well, this week our team went to a new restaurant, where they offer a pizza for three. I've never seen this anywhere else. It was as big as any pizza I've ever seen in the States and it had a much, much thicker crust than the typical Italian pizza. It comes with buffalo mozzarella, garlic and cherry tomatoes, but you could add any topping you wished.

Upon leaving, we passed a table where they had ordered the pizza for three topped with hotdogs and french fries! Yes, hotdogs and french fries! And they weren't McDonald's fries either--we're talking huge steak fries (actually, our STINT gal from the Netherlands said they're Belgian Fries). Wow. Definitely a first. Can't say I'll be trying it any time soon. . . but I know where you can get it if you're interested!